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Monday, June 9, 2014

Faith & Failure: A Letter to My Teenage-Self by Mitch Roush

FAITH & FAILURE: A Letter to My Teenage-Self


By: Mitchell Roush


Dear Mitch,
Congratulations! You’ve made it to 13!

You’re in the middle of a wonderfully cultured childhood and adolescence. Seriously, the way your parents have chosen to unveil life is about as stellar as it gets. (Thought I’d throw that in there since you’re about to make things very interesting around the house for a while.)

Now that the teenage era has arrived: BUCKLE UP! 
Over the next 13 years, you’ll see many things you wish you could UN-see. Experience life- altering majesty and travesty. Discovery and wonder will run rampant for all the right and wrong reasons. 

Most importantly, your journey will be seasoned with grace and should be heard. Your faith will survive and become the anchor of which you desperately need. It won’t look anything like you thought. Nor will it resemble much of what you’ve seen up to this point.

Now, please, bear with me as I spew some vulnerable truth. There are many things I wish I had considered more. Here’s the skinny...

3 Things You’ll Learn The Hard Way:

* Practice Helps Shape Conviction.
I know right now it seems like a major drag that Mom & Dad drag you to church. But stay with me on this one. Being raised in the church is a greater blessing that you know. It’ll take you a while to come around to the idea. You like pushing their button, I get that. The deeper reason why you’re not really digging this church-thing is you haven’t found your conviction yet. You haven’t really stepped in the mud too much yet.
And that’s all right for now.

It’s okay to practice the prayers and songs before you find it. The faith of your parents is raw and authentic. It’s strong enough to bleed-over into your life. But it won’t be enough to sustain you thru the journey of which you’re about to embark.

Sometimes the most important thing we can do is show-up. Witnessing others experience grace will change you. Embracing the potency of healing worship will impact you more than you know. The beauty of prayer may not seem real but you’ll undoubtedly see it touch the lives of many you know.

Before you throw it all to the wayside, know first that God isn’t waiting on you—He’s actively engaging you. And sooner than you realize, Holy Spirit and life will demolish your naivety and welcome you to the passionate realm of conviction.

You’re faith will become your own, I promise. This is where the foundation is built. 

* Asking The Difficult Questions Is More Courageous Than Blind Certainty.

Over the next 13 years your world is going to be rocked. There’s no way to sugarcoat it: You will lose your innocence this year. Addiction, horrible decisions, consequences, close-calls and much more will pile-up. The silver lining?...It’ll be clear your parents understand grace and creativity deeper than the church context you find yourself in.

This will spark a season of wonder, confusion, tough questions and discovery of faith.

Thru your college years and mid-twenty’s, your faith, art and discoveries will take you places you never imagined. You’ll leave your “heritage” behind. Loving-Fundies1 will think you’ve left the reservation; and in a way you have. But you will thrive. Christ will be clearer than ever.

This, too, will spark a season of wonder, confusion, tough questions and discovery of faith.

In a religious society that’s fixated on making everything black-and-white, you’ll find and embrace the Jesus that hangs-out in the grey. You’ll grow more comfortable being in the minority. Creativity will ooze from your soul. Flying your nerd-flag high and proud will become a staple for which others can recognize and respect.

This, as well, will spark a season of wonder, confusion, tough questions and discovery of faith.

Don’t settle for the easy, convenient or comfortable in this life.
Tho it will be discouraged, don’t stop asking the questions that ruffle feathers. In reality, they’ll only multiply the more life you experience. And trust me, the discoveries to be had will make it all worth it. 

Blind certainty is an easy and enticing trap to fall into. Don’t let it quell your thirst for learning and wonder.

* The Only One That Can Unlock The Shackles of Grudges and Guilt Is YOU.
You’re going to hurt a lot of people deeply.
Some of which will be you’re lowest points. Eventually, you’ll own up and take responsibility. Most will forgive you. But you are going to battle endlessly with yourself because you refuse to accept grace. You’ll grow addicted to your shame.

Additionally, you’ll be scarred by a few heroes that you’ve respected and looked up to for years. Betrayal will play a starring role in your journey for a season. Anger will fester. You’ll fall into the trap of letting the imperfections of others compromise your faith.

Then, in the middle of this self-inflicted wilderness, two unlikely advocates will drop truth bombs on you:

+ None of your turmoil is a surprise to God.
+ The foundation of your ministry comes from your pain.
 
As you grow and learn, Holy Spirit will surround you hurting, angry and de-churched people. You’ll discover your love for cultivating relationship with them.

Slowly but surely, you’ll grow more comfortable with embracing grace for yourself. Releasing forgiveness from your clenched fists will liberate your soul and heal hindered relationships. You won’t be the same. Weathering the shame-addiction will seem possible for the first time in years. You’ll finally let love in.

Why did I write this?
Because, Mitch, you’re going to need a reminder. Sometimes you’ll need an intentional nudge. The teenage self, the current self, and the future self will be better by remembering this...

The one thing you’ll keep returning to is COMMUNITY.

That will be where you rediscover scandalous grace. Where you’ll be renewed. Where you’ll be challenged to grow. Where you’ll be welcomed. Where you’re creativity will thrive. Where you’ll be called to listen and share. Where you’ll heal. Where you’ll bring others to find all that you’ve found and more.
Community is often the most ignored aspect of faith and—yet—perhaps the most profound. You need to remember, it’s not about me—it’s about us.

Holy Spirit is not finished yet. Your artisan soul is still evolving.
Keep fighting the good fight.
Learn from your stupidity. Remember the good.
Strive for the more that we are meant for.
…and you will see your potential become your reality.

With All Of Me,

~ Your Wandering Older Self!

P.S.
The Woman you marry is the most beautiful soul you’ll ever meet. Her love is deeper than you can comprehend. She’ll make you better for all the right reasons. So you got that going for you...which is nice!

1 Loving-Fundies: A friendly term I use to describe many loved ones back home. Fundies is short for Fundamentalists. A general term describing members of the “heritage” I’m referencing.


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You Can Learn More About Mitch Here...

www.TheMitchRoush.com


An open heart and a passionate spirit. Published playwright and therapeutic writer. Mitch is a graduate of York College with degrees in Communications & Theatre w/ a minor in Biblical Studies. While at York, he took part in short-term missions in Mexico and China. On the heels of college Mitch attended The International Theatre Academy of Norway in Oslo to study creativity and entrepreneurship. Roush has been a guest key-note speaker; teacher and performer at numerous events and universities. He is currently the Campus Team Developer for the Let’s Start Talking (LST) Ministry. Roush is a Red Sox Fan and still questions the Warren Commission. He and his wife Marissa live the dream in Ft. Worth, TX with their JRT, Elektra. 

4 comments:

  1. Thank you so much for granting me a forum to share my story, LVM!

    It's amazing to see how much hind-sight changes things. Nevertheless, the imperfect journey is a beautiful thing to behold.

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  2. I enjoyed reading this post! Finding the "Jesus that hangs out in the gray" has been a journey of mine more recently. I am a born-and-raised Loving-Fundie - still am in a lot of ways but open to a whole lot more the Spirit has to offer. Thanks for sharing!

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    Replies
    1. Thanks for reading and sharing, Amy!
      This post provided much more therapy than I was aware I needed. You should explore a project like this as well. It's surprisingly liberating.

      Truly, we're all on a journey. Discovering the vastness of the grey is one of which I'm still on. But even among all it's imperfections--it's still beautiful!

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  3. I'm so grateful to have your words of wisdom on this page, Mitch! Thanks again!

    ReplyDelete